Crossroads

Becoming aware of the many possibilities regarding one's life can be quite baffling. Life is a choice. One's course in life depends greatly on the choices that one makes. Decisions, most especially those that matter can alter one's fate in an instant. Perhaps that's one of the reasons why counselors would often advice me not to make any abrupt decisions when at the height of my emotions. Quite rightly so. One should think twice when making any big decision about one's own life. The consequences and repercussions of a choice might just be overwhelming if one has not been prudent.
I'm at crossroads right now. Life is offering me wonderful possibilities that I could realize. As to what that might be falls unto the palm of my hand. Yet, I have not made any decision yet. I'm undecided. Presently, i could not still figure out what to choose. Noviciate or Extended Postulancy? Both are promising. But I have to choose only one.
Yet somehow, it dawned on me that this crossroads is not a mere matter of choice. I should not forget to acknowledge the Superior power that emanates through the cosmos and to the whole of my being. The possibilities that lay ahead does not fall entirely into my hands. The path, way of life, decision that I'll be making is not just a matter of choice, but a matter of discernment as well. This choice should be coupled with prayer. This is a way of believing in Providence. After all, it is God who knows what's best for me.

"WHY?" Why does it have to be always me? Why is life like this? Why is it that the most difficult questions on earth begin with a "Why?" Why???
Indeed, man has the inherent desire to know: one good reason why one keeps asking the "why" questions.
A phenomenon has kept recurring recently these days. In every beginning of my exposures in the mission areas, something bad happens. Talking about my health, last month i suffered from skin asthma. The next week after that my gums were swollen because of a wisdom tooth wanting to come out. And just last week, i stepped on a nail which caused me a painful injection of anti-tetanus and some more medication. All of these happened while i was on the missions. Many a times, i would ask God "Why?" Are these all signs? It really bothers me up until now, i'm still struggling with missionary work.
Yet i think its good though that one never stops asking "why?" "Why" questions demand deep thinking and reflection. And when one begins to ask "why" and pursues to find its answer, he/she embarks on an inward journey that will surely reveal a lot of truth-discoveries not just about himself but of the world around him as well.
For the past few weeks, I've been asking a lot of Why questions. And my inquiring mind has led me to a state of deep reflection and the endeavor of being in touch with my true self. I have been purifying my intentions why i am doing missionary work. I'm constantly pondering why i want become a Redemptorist priest someday. And experience tells me that I am on a journey which solely revolves around the goal of knowing myself. Up until now, this sailing forth has brought about revelations about myself which would either be hurtful or wonderful, or even both. I say it's a sojourn worth pursuing.

Don't stop asking why, and never cease to pursue its answer... you might just know yourself more.

THe Devil's Beatitudes

We have Christ's beattitudes (instructions for a happy life), but there's another set of beautitudes, curiously from the Devil. Read and check if you might be living them rather than Jesus Christ's standards of living a happy life.

"Blessed are those who are too tired, too busy, too distracted to spend an hour once a week with their fellow Christians in the Church." THEY ARE MY BEST WORKERS

"Blessed are those Christians who wait to be asked and expect to be thanked." I CAN USE THEM.

"Blessed are the touchy, with a bit of luck they may stop going to church." THEY ARE MY MISSIONARIES.

"Blessed are those who are very religious but get on everyone's nerves." THEY ARE MINE FOREVER.

"Blessed are the troublemakers." THEY SHALL BE CALLED MY CHILDREN

"Blessed are those who have no time to pray." THEY ARE EASY PREY FOR ME.

"Blessed are the gossipers." FOR THEY ARE MY SECRET AGENTS.

"Blessed are those critical of church leadership." FOR THEY SHALL INHERIT A PLACE WITH ME IN MY KINGDOM.

"Blessed are the complainers." I'M ALL EARS FOR THEM.

"Blessed are you when you read this and think it is about other people and not yourself." I'VE GOT YOU!

Banana

Master Oogway, the wise turtle in the animated movie “Kung Fu Panda” once said, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. But, today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” I guess that kind of wisdom best describes our journey to postulancy as of this time. We live each day one moment at a time. Each day brings experiences which vary from being familiar, dull, exciting, challenging, novel to being funny. Each experience is significant since it is part and parcel of a wonderful journey of formation.
We ended the month of June with a bang as the Jubilee anniversary was celebrated here in Dumaguete. The three of us, after having just finished our short-lived mission exposure in the parish areas were again busy for the grand fiesta celebration. One notable project we had was a mural painting which was to be used as backdrop both for the variety show the night before the feast, and as a part of the decoration during lunch on the very feast day. We had sleepless nights just to finish that project since it was given to us only a week prior to the fiesta. If collegians are having the thought that in postulancy, gone are the days of working until the wee hours, they better think again. The library in the monastery which served as our workplace looked as if it were struck by the bagyong Feria, signal no. 4! Anyhow with utter perseverance and dedication, we finished our Obra Maestra just in the nick of time. That experience gave us lots of lessons about teamwork, patience and commitment. It also strengthened the working dynamics of the batch as we poured out our talents and skills, each contributing for the success of the project.
Our involvement in the Jubilee anniversary celebration didn’t just end there. We also had assignments at the variety show which showcased the talents of many parishioners and people from the area. During that night, we had a discovery about the Dumagueteños: Their very, and I mean very, enthusiastic about healing. Here’s how we came to know that:
That night, the talents being showcased were becoming monotonous. For some reason, most were dance numbers with music that could only either be Jaiho (by the Pussycat dolls) and Poker face (by Lady gaga.) It was obvious that many were becoming bored already most especially the aged people. Others were leaving while others were just waiting for their turn to present and soon they would be off as well. One of our tasks was to animate the audience by teaching them the Banana dance. (If you have no idea about that icebreaker, better consult the SACFH collegians who are fond of doing this dance.) Anyway, it dawned on us that in order for the people to be participative about the activity, we had to disguise it to something that would have an appeal to them. Bombit and I thought that they would surely cooperate if we’ll say that the activity was about healing. And we were so right. After announcing that it was a healing activity, the audience ran closer to the stage. Just imagine, even the nanays who were at the gate of the church, clearly about to leave, came back. I said to them, “Tonight, we will call on the Espiritu sa Kaayo for us to be healed.” Of course, I really didn’t mean that since obviously neither my companion nor I had the gift of healing. To even impress the audience more, we had the special participation of Fr. John Michael Salatandol, C.Ss.R. who served as the mananabtan, invoking the Espiritu or whatever that is. With Gregorian music, Fr. John slowly danced with moves I could not understand. I was already trying hard not to burst into laughter. But the people bought that, imitating every move of the mananabtan, I mean Fr. John. Judging from the looks of their faces, the people were falling for the activity. Suddenly, Peter Paul grabbed the mike and sang with a very high-pitched tone, “Ba…na…na…” The people were shocked. Their jaws dropped. But they had no choice. It was too late for them to realize that it was a prank. And so we sang, “peel banana, peel peel banana… chop banana, chop, chop banana…” Along with the thumping beat of the drums, what the people could only do was to dance with us. All burst into laughter since they were all victimized by our simple prank.
The people thought it was healing, but were stunned finding out that it was a prank. As for me, I still thought that it was healing. Only that it was of a different sort—the kind of healing brought about by laughter, joy and happiness.

Remeniscing the recent past....

I am indebted to a lot of people... those who have become part and parcel of my life journey...
without them, I would not be what I am today...

I was teary-eyed when I graduated college, moved by the very thought that a lot of persons walked and climbed with me through the different mountains...

Here's my graduation speech on that unforgettable night when i had the chance to say thanks to all who have touched my life...

"We have finally come to this momentous day of our graduation. Years of seemingly countless academic endeavors have not only taught us the values of hardwork, dedication, patience and perseverance, but have made us grow to become better human persons. Indeed, today marks the culmination of our college years. Yet the journey has not come to an end. The dawn of a new beginning awaits each of us. Tomorrow, we shall face the challenges of life with ever more inspired and passionate minds and hearts, inculcated with profound learnings, values and insights.

Yet what sets us apart from typical college students of our time is not merely the intellectual or academic training we have received from this institute. More significant is the holistic religious formation that has created in us transformed and integrally developed beautiful persons. We have emerged victorious and successful because we strove not just with our own bare hands, but we labored with the grace and guidance of God’s loving hands. All of our pursuits would have been in vain if it were not for Him. In our venture, we have not just learned and understood, but we have also prayed and believed. Our faith in Him has made us realize our dreams.

We are graduates not merely of a Philosophy degree, but we are graduates of a precious college seminary formation as well. We owe the human values and the various lessons of life we now possess to God, the source of all wisdom, and to the many instruments he has sent: our formators, spiritual directors, professors, families and all who have unrelentingly shared their gift of person, empowering and inspiring us to continue and to soar high in our sojourn.

I remember once asking God, “Why was I born?” and “What is the meaning of life?” He answered by telling me that life has a purpose and mission to fulfill. Even beyond this is the deeply touching truth that God is calling me to love because He loves no matter what, and he has loved me since the very day I was born. My fellow brothers, the same is true in your unique lives. Let us not be shaken by our doubts and fears. The scriptures say, “God does not call those who are equipped, but he equips those whom he has called.” Though many people and even we may not truly understand the deep mystery of our calling, we nevertheless sail forth without knowing what lies ahead, only knowing that, in our hearts lies our faith and trust in Him.

Today we celebrate the gift of our vocation and we give our heartfelt and utmost thanks to the Lord who calls and sends holy apostles to His Church!

For the many persons who have become part and parcel of our life-mission, we seminarians extend our sincerest gratitude!

To my fellow brothers, Padayon! Let us continue to be the bearers of the light of Jesus which touches, transforms and redeems the lives of His people."

who am I?

Perhaps it would be nice to begin this blog with a little introduction about myself.
My name is Niel. I hail from Davao, Philippines and is currently a Postulant seminarian of the Redemptorist congregation. Yes! I aspire to be a priest someday, and each day that dream seem to be becoming more and more real. I am the type of person who loves to do a lot of adventures... travel, meet new people and establish new acquaintances, eat and explore, eat and run... eat and sleep... and do a lot of praying.

I see life as colorful, filled with vibrant colors. In my hand lies a brush through which I paint my life with different human strokes. But the mural I'm working on is not yet done. Its upshot is still a mystery. Somehow, I sense that it is not solely I who's painting the mural of my life.

I love art. Art was my first love. Then came music. It was the second best thing besides art. Then I realized that they could be coupled. That's when magic came.

I believe that life is purpose-driven. Each has his/her mission to fulfill. In a sense, we are missionaries or pilgrims. As for me, I own the mission of being good. Sounds simple but quite complicated and challenging in reality.

I believe that best way to know a person is the way he leads his/her life. Each person is a mystery. Yet each human being has the capability of radiating his/her inner beauty depending on his/her choice.

I have the traits of being serious, reflective, jolly, cheerful, crazy, witty, moody, enthusiastic, loving, frank,.. all rolled into one. That's me.

I think that will be it for now. I've been up until wee hours for many days now. My body needs to doze off after having a heavy day.